The girl next door

This is rare.

Let me just preface this, with, I know this is bullshit, but it disturbed me, so I'm writing it down. I know this is the last thing someone would want to hear, but...well, yeah.

It's 6:20 am. I just woke up crying from a stupid dream that the guy I'm into was with another girl.

Now this is insane, because while awake I have no worries. I have no idea why this dream had the emotional impact it did on me while I slept.

Uh, (*agravated) and worse yet the girl in the dream was completely made up. Which makes me feel stupid. I mean if dreams are supposed to be reflections of your subconsious thoughts, can my subconsious at least get the girl right? It so doesn't even matter. I've never been the jealous type. I don't have a right to tell anyone who they can and can't hook up with. I'm not going to either.

I'm almost ready to really apologize for putting this out there, but it freaked me out, to where  it's now 6:24 and I'm wide awake, and I knew I would  be until I wrote this out.  

So, there it is, my subconsious just jacked my head.

Worse yet, I have this stupid Howie Day Song in my head that JM did a cover for, the whole entire first verse keeps playing in my head!  I woke up, and that was the only thing I could think of and I know somehow it's tied to this to the dream. Maybe because of the crying? Can anyone please tell me what the point of the following song is??? See! I don't even know the meaning of the song right now, and it's burning itself into my consiousness....

HOWIE DAY LYRICS

Girl Next Door

Well she fixes up her shirt,
No she wouldn't go for you
And she mixes up her albums
Cause she doesn't like that order you do
And she loves a second way, 
Hey, your first way is permanently through
And she'll never want to go to the movie,
The same one that you do

And if this love is superstitious then everything we did is on call
And if this love is gonna make it then maybe I should turn it up

And the girl next door is cryin'
I dunno what I want to do
Next door she's cryin'
Let me go, let me go for you (let me go for you)

(You...You...You)

Well I watched as she moves from the bedroom to the living room floor
And I'll knock on her door and tell her what i've been waiting for
And she'll smack me upside the head, its a crazy scene
Save your best for your own, thats how I want it to be

And if this love is superstitious then everything we did is on call
And if this love is gonna make it then maybe I should turn it up

Well the girl next door is cryin'
I dunno what I want to do
Next door she's cryin
Let me go, let me go for you

I don't want a new love...

You

I don't want a new love...

You

I don't want a new love...

You

I don't want a new love...

 

Alright, there it's out-- and I'll probably regret this tomorrow.

*sad laughter- how's this for a quote:

Even if you think the flame has died, there's at least one lyric that'll hit that last hot spot, and then you'll find yourself as fucked as you were the day you lied and said you never wanted to see her again."  Author: John Mayer 

 

Sorry, for the use of profanity, but that's really the only word that's got it summed up at 6:32 in the morning. fuck.