Crash and Burn...

as quick as it has begun, like so many things in my life...
it's over.
I can't but help hearing the "I told you so's"

Even after just a small tear letting this morning, I realize,
what more could I have hoped for?

it always ends...

shallow waters lay with someone else.....

I think I might start using names in this journal. I don't know why I've always been everything else to everyone else....

I guess in some way I wasn't as committed as I say I was either...I still called HIM last night, and yes Mr. Someone, I was reaching out for you last night....and why?

because deep down I knew, despite my "affection" for Mr. Boots....he hurt me....
and I don't get sad I get even.

That and I love being listened to....which is where He comes in...
and I love being held....thats where Someone else comes in...
and...
once again I thought one man can be both....

to want is to be dissapointed...

I've got a month of vacation right ahead of me...and despite wanting to live it up in my "bad girl" way....maybe this "break up" for a lack of a better term, was just what I needed....

For once I'm not questioning, what I did wrong though....I never did anything wrong with you Mr. Someone, I just loved you.
I never did anything wrong with HIM, I never did something wrong with my EX, I never did anything wrong with T---
I'm an incredible, intelligent, wonderful, caring and compasionate person who loves with every fiber in my body....thats who I am.
It's got nothing to do with me.
-------------
Heres to me....

I know a girl
She puts the color inside of my world
But she's just like a maze
Where all of the walls all continually change
And I've done all I can
To stand on her steps with my heart in my hands
Now I'm starting to see
Maybe it's got nothing to do with me

Fathers, be good to your daughters
Daughters will love like you do
Girls become lovers who turn into mothers
So mothers, be good to your daughters too

Oh, you see that skin?
It's the same she's been standing in
Since the day she saw him walking away
Now she's left
Cleaning up the mess he made

So fathers, be good to your daughters
Daughters will love like you do
Girls become lovers who turn into mothers
So mothers, be good to your daughters too

Boys, you can break
You'll find out how much they can take
Boys will be strong
And boys soldier on
But boys would be gone without the warmth from
A womans good, good heart

On behalf of every man
Looking out for every girl
You are the god and the weight of her world

So fathers, be good to your daughters
Daughters will love like you do
Girls become lovers who turn into mothers
So mothers, be good to your daughters too