"True friends are those who walk in when everyone else has walked out. "
~Or~
"A friend is the person who believes in you, when you fail to Believe in Yourself."

Thanks you friends...
I know you see the tears I give no reason for, and the sleep I never have...
We all have choices, and
"Life is a game of pattern and chance, those who play well will win."
In the words of JM, and the mantra of Someone I respect, miss, and hope to see soon:
I refuse to believe that my life will be an endless strand me inconsistancies

It's been said: You learn some thing new everyday. today for example, I learned the paper boy delivers the paper at 5am.
"The Talk" / continuation of said Talk has -Here's redundancy- has continued.
I'm not sure how I feel. but after a call to re-assure my safety, I'm going
To bed with a smile .

You know you're a teacher when you had a crazy friday night, and when you wake up not hung over like you should be, but
thinking of art projects and "Comfort mechanisms" to help your children succeed.
Omg. another random dream about Him. Funny thing is I wake up from these dreams shocked.
I don't think i finished last night i was so tired but the night despite its problems ended well. C as always helps me find my
Smile. We'll be going to a show on February 15. I get to meet again another famous L. the world and It's coincidences.
2 Parties and more drinking to occur. as my head is pounding I don't know how much i'll partake of the latter. sometime, and
somehow, i have to make time for C tonight too. don't know if I can make it happen.
In that respect, It's 9:30-I'm going back to bed.
Oh. before i forget, nice encounter with one of the boys in blue. everyone present had alcohol in their system so i'm hoping
See being a strong believer in shaping my own reality has paid off. :-)
Everything I want and have worked for seems to be coming full circle. Again, this being in control thing-Bomb.

"He" who is not the boyfriend, while not approved has received a very large honor unbeknownst to HIM, he has been present now
for lambda-ness and given the role of picture taker. a task usually assigned to "Boyfriends."
Up and down night but ended with a large drinking tab.

In the famous words of JM: "I'm never speaking up again."
So... in an effort to get girl advice, i've been talking to a co-worker about my luv life.
Ofcourse, small world being what it is. she tells me today I find out she's known HIM longer than I have.
So...yeah. "My stupid mouth"

Comment from Four: as I ask her to set aside a fundraiser for me:
"I will make sure to set aside a box of the juiciest, most deliciously-dipped strawberries for your friend-slash-friend-with-benefits-slash-boytoy-slash-whatever, a.k.a. <Insert HIS name here>"
Now thats why I love my girl, always keeping it real. LOL.
it was just too on point not to add in... love you!!!! til i have time..."the other half of the friend slash friend with benefits every time the moon is full slash i'm the best thing he's got so hell get used to it slash on call booty call cuz i like to get mine but yeah busy ass grad student with no life aint seen my friends for weeks cuz i go to the gym at six and dont come home till nine from class and work slash lazy bug-a-boo thats wasting her time typing when she should be reading sista"

From "Nothing but love" to "Nothing." The cycle has begun yet again. This time I am prepared. Tonight didn't bother me, as we
were, and could not, be caught.
Lol. can't write. HE is im'ing me

So i know i'm only hearing what i want. but this is the second time the title "Boyfriend"-Has been used. It's amazing how just
A word can put you in such a good mood. :) i didn't do my homework though. but i will do it. watch. and now i'll do it with a
smile. *Ugh. i like it like that. she working that back. i don't know how to act. slow motion for me...

I feel weak. but i don't care. this semesters gonna suck. 4 Grad classes. thats two semesters worth. i'm so gonna do this.
I might die. but i'll graduate damn it.

Ugh! and stuff

ugh! five second frustration vent: Why is it that ex boyfriends feel that they still "know you" enough to tell you that you don't know what's best for your life? Grrrr.
I mean c'mon, you left me, where was all your care and concern then? grrr
but you know what as predicted, i got my phone call, and i'll get another one, from He who makes all things good.  watch it's predictable. but till then..,..grrr
"I'll find my happiness at the bottom of this choclate choclate chip."--!00 girls
--in my case, Cookies from C's mom, hee hee ---Pumpkin choclate chip cookies ---damn i'll have to go to the gym and work extra hard now. oh well, all worth it.
C's dad gave me a spider man blanket. In his words "Every kid should have a Spiderman Blanket"
Well, i really want to be a kid for five seconds....

Meetings, mom, and the "Girl World"

5 hours and 48 minutes later, I am done with a National Meeting.
So what did I do in my 5 hours and 48 minutes, well, I listened intently ofcourse, but while my call got dropped 13 times!!!! I decided to look at hotel and travel accomodations for me and C this Spring Break.

IS it going to happen? probably not, but taking my Stepmom's advice, why give up right?--BTW, What's up mom?!?!?!?!

For the El Paso Crew, all who know my step mom, we all know, she's one cool lady. Hence, no real surprise why she would be cool enough to submit her thoughts on her "eldest" daughters random, and still "so-called" life.

Especially in the arena's of love and quite bluntly lust....

Some background for those of you who don't know this woman....

Met her when I was like what 9? Despite random disagreements, and all and all teenage stuff, I think we both just loved my dad and just have the jealous woman syndrome when it comes down to it and have since learned to share.

But why she's cool....

"mom" introduced me to the "wine cooler"--I was 14. I worked till midnight, and as she put it, "hey you work like an adult, you get the privaleges of an adult"

"mom", saw me and dad from about 15 to 22 get rather trashed, and was still cool enough not only to love us both, but get us menudo in the morning despite her own predictable hang over.

"mom" has known about every guy I've hooked up with since I moved to the 505 and those she doesn't know about, well--lets put it this way, she said, at 14-- "I think you're smart and beautiful" then we went and got the pill.

"mom"--lets face it is a MILF. (well not me for me personally, because thats gross, but  I mean, c'mon, but yeah, She's hot.)

"mom" let me throw whip-cream parties, and stayed in her room as keys were collected, and "refreshments" were drank. (Responsibly, and I've always agreed--We were going to do it anyways, at least she knew what we were drinking because she bought it)
"mom" never ratted on me to dad, despite her probably knowing most of what I was doing or rather, who....
Well, best quotes from "mom":
After painful events, "Your own father doesn't hit you, no other man has the right to"
After the random circulation from my own biological mother of my Sexual Preferance came into question, "I don't care if you like men or women, they just better treat you right----- and if they have money all the better"
After telling her about Mr. Someone, my (now correct) assumptions of him having a girlfriend and me being "the other woman"-- she questioned:
"Was he better than????" -- yes
"Do you care?" -- no
"then have your fun"--okay

After telling her about HIM--lol, "I knew it"

She reminds me of the mom from Mean Girls, but not so dumb.

Anyways, she's a cool gal. A real good friend, and I'm glad to have her as a reader, like EVERONE ELSE mom, the rules apply to you too (see previous entry re: rules). Don't know long you've been reading-- but I hope you find it as amusing as everyone else.

So a select few have had the privaledge of meeting this chica, in particuliar I remember my first night ever at "The boy in blue" and seeing a familiar face (now in alaska,). When they asked if he knew me I believe he stated, "Who Zuby?--that was the first party I ever got trashed at, and ended up staying the night at her parents place--" Yeah, good times.

BTW, for my boys in blue, shall any of you ever stumble upon, or simply for those of you whho might relay the msg: I miss you guys....divorce sucks, you always seem to loose more than the spouse.
But Rush because you can, and do a damn good job like you always do...this sorority girl might be growing up, but if there's a party you know you're always VIP, always MY welcomed guest, and it's harder to stay away then ya'll might think ;-)

Speaking of Sorority-ness, I just met the nicest GIRL! she's from the "pretty house"--and we all know that one, so naturally, i thought she'd hate me. But maybe because like most "frat houses" a girlfriend club seems exist in all, and i've finally put in enough time or enough appearances to be noticed.
Anywhoo--she's bomb. and seriously, if I ever hear another word of crap about her house I might bitch slap the girl who says it. well, maybe not, but I know my narrow minded days are long since over and she validated everything I believed.

But now, another point from Mean Girls, "In Girl World" ---you smile, tell her boyfriend he looks better with his hair pushed back, while all the while you know its every girl for herself--viscious but perhaps true. Therefore, as always, I do my best to smile, and leave the girlfiend circle with grace--wishing to myself most secretly, but  knowing I still don't and probably won't ever qualify. After all there is that little thing of being "the friend" and not "the girlfriend"

So yeah, speaking of being "single" I've finally decided I'm the best thing HE has. I know I kinda went there the other night, but it's so now obvious.
I am so truly the best thing to have ever hit HIM.
therefore, as he's out right now with yet another blonde, even less clothed then myself, i'm contented in knowing, He'll come back, nothing will have happened, He's going to do his homework, and at 9:02 or so i'll be getting a phone call.

Ewe homework....plus Lambda-ness, yes school is in affect. Expect nothing from me, and you might be pleased to actually get it.
....and now to my own happy world of fines and fun. One of my board members just reminded me, I have just been nominated for another year, so....shall I go back to my 365 emails or attend another national meeting? I also have two books to read for class??  hmmmm,.....decisions decisions.

Todays events. Laid in C's bed, scantly dressed and read playboy while i was ignored. life is so amusing

The begining of a semester brings forth new beginings. C has begun to ask, for example, how i 'rate' his new blonde friend.
Like all the rest I smile at her and realize; although C deserves to be happy ~ It's not the pretty blonde ones that are
exactly lining up to to help him out with that. perhaps, this is the greatest of tools us women keep in our pink toolbox
I'm going to bed now with the thought that yes dating is something i can consider.
Says she who is crashing at 12 on a friday
In the words of a 5 yr old. "We're All Done!!!"

Forward from 3

No one falls in love by choice, it is by CHANCE.
No one stays in love by chance, it is by WORK.
And no one falls out of love by chance, it is by CHOICE

Okay. so still got the 6:45 a.m. gym thing going. be proud. only back fall- It's 9:35 and i'm about to crash. luv you j.
I appreciate all the support you've been giving me. marine luv~ thanks for the calls and messages. i miss you.
Classes are going well considering i'm taking 5 graduate courses. and a full load is 2.
And i go to the gym. and i work full time teaching, and i'm an area supervisor~~And yes i make time to play. hee hee
Other than that nothing new. --Actually. new perspective today. summary: i'm going to let this "Relationship" i'm in just be.
He said he didn't want commitment so i'm not going to force it. in the end i know where my pedastol is, and i'm quite content
until i'm taken off that top shelf, i guess i'll just get sweeter with time. It's day 2 of class and i've got spring break on

Life is good, Porn is better.
Is this true, and do I really have any intention on speaking of the matter? Well this remains to be seen. But I did think it
Sounded catchy when I got home. entirely too late might i add. but what can you do a kitchen had to be seen. - well not really
Technically I invited myself but, well like usual He didn't seen to mind.
Hey J, thanks for the update. always nice. the rest of the cyber world can learn from your example. :-)
Lambda-ness got messy tonight but nothing i am going to allow to ruin my "In control" calm. i like it, and i plan on keeping
it. euro trip was the evening movie. good times. *Yawn. i'm waiting for my laundry. its the longest 10 Minutes of my life.
No not really. ooh. wouldn't it be cool if we could choose the moments we'd want to stretch?
What would yours be? i wonder how many moment would include the opposite sex? i wonder how many would just involve sex?
its funny. the moment i'm thinking of already seems like it lasted forever. maybe i just want to change the moment. give the
Right answer second time around. wow. well no changing what might be the exact moment leading me to my current happiness. so
Se la vie. ooh. theses laundry
It really is the simple things in life that make you happy. or wait. maybe It's realizing the complicated things don't have to
take the joy out of everything. ~Regardless i'm happy. hope everyone else is too. good luck manana to all those in school. xxx

Joined the Club

Exhausted. But day off manana.
Been doing my "work" with Lambda-ness, and Damn, I'm good. but yeah... I like this whole, "I've got it together" thing. It's kinda nice.

In that respect, I think the dating thing just might be fun again. For all those inquiring, you may sign up on my calender, I have an available slot on Monday (as it is a holiday) and as of now, first come, first serve when it comes to the ever popular Thursday, Friday, Saturday free time that I possess. So, if you can "pencil me in" I can do the same for you.

You have my number. I invite you to use it, and yeah, I  won't cry if you don't.

Besitos

It's 9a.m. I've been awake for an hour. as i've laid in bed the following thoughts have raced through my brain. 1. what was
John Mayer playing last night in the tsunami relief concert? 2. I wonder how much money i have left in my account after last
night. 3. How much i really don't want to get out of bed to start this day. 4. How soon school will begin. 5. Why does the
universe haunt me with reminders of the past?
So...Here was yesterday. The begining of Lambda-ness begins with a 3 hour session and suprisingly-It's all good. that ends.
Followed by dinner with Sis and C. That ends. So begins the solo night with C. All is looking promising as i look cute and hot
and yeah. - Well I should have guessed it was going to be a night when the bar were supposed to be at is closed. okay. we wait
it out at the bar next door. bar were supposed to be at opens. no surprise, were 2 hours early before the band is schedulled
to play. we figure we'll wait it out. and play pool. So begins my twighlight zone reminders.
As we approach the bar, who else but JM would be on tv. no sweat. i move on. time passes new bartender enters the scene.
I look at him, he looks at me. its not him i think. and its not. but right in front of me serving my beer is Mr. Someones
Clone. thinking i'm on crack or that i've already had too much, i ignore it. throughout the night this bartender keeps coming
to check on us. i guess un-alone in my observation, C points out the obvious...
"That looks just like ..." ~ "Yes C, I know" ~ "Its not him, you know" " ~ "I know."
"Do you really think he's cute?" :-\ ~ "Yes C, I find him very attractive."
Subjects change. night goes on. drinking continues. I get a phone call, its J. i relay my night from the quiet of a bathroom.
We evaluate the universe and conclude with, "WEIRD."
The bands suck. We leave. Frontier is made into a quick stop- as there are "people he knows." God forbid we're spotted. Lol.
My place it is. We walk in and i'm called out. "Whats wrong?" I don't know what to say. For once in the back of my mind the
thought crosses my mind, "I think it might be okay to remember?" As always, I smile. I say, "Nothing."
He calls me when he gets home. I call him sweetheart. he laughs at my new label. I wake up and "Daughters" runs through my
head. so begins my morning...
Lol. For once, rather than be wrapped or fixated, I just find it funny. Gym time.

Online on a Friday night, by choice???

Yes homies, or lack there of.

I am home on a Friday night, and actually not bugged by this.

Why, we ask? Simple. One, I got considered for being taken out twice, but by the time I got back to them, both Chicitas had other plans, that didn't involve me, as I didn't answer my phone to accept invites, but se-la-vie.

Also, I have plans manana. Yay, plans. I love plans. Especially with C. --There really is no better "good times"--well, unless you count that time in Mexico, and well, then there was that time this summer....oh and then there was the night I ended up in some random closet with a Star Wars theme with that random Fraternity boy from Las Cruces that my girlfriend liked, and then we were pulled over by the cops, but let go because the cop thought i could drive, but I couldn't because it was his truck and I don't drive Standard, which was even crazier because somehow i did drive home that night with him and then the next morning, well, I can't remember his name, but I do have this cute A&F shirt, lol. ---Wow tangent much? What was I talking about????

Oh yes, good times...well okay, I've had my share, but emotionally---???

Ah, hell--who am I kidding? Okay so I'm the kinda girl that wouldn't mind occasionally swapping a few "good times" for a few well "memorable times." But well we're working on it, right?

uh oh. Sorror here...must be a good host. chat later

I think i have the internet from hell. *Sigh
Lambda-ness is weird lately. but nothing extreme. or rather--I have chosen not to make it extreme in my life.
J called. and for this we are appreciative. :-) unfortunately i'm still accustoming myself to my new lifestyle of chasing 5 yr
olds. somehow i'm still getting to the gym. i refuse to gain back the weight i had over the summer or just when i was dating
Grr... HE came over tonight. he "Just missed me" after "a whole week" of not seeing me. lol. i laugh, but anyone who knows me
knows i love it. and i know i've said it a hundred times but i think i might truly love him. Not love, like "Babe, I love you"
But like, "Yeah... i'd go with him to california if he asked-But he never will"
To think 8 months ago the questions are still all the same. then again, maybe not. now maybe the appropriate question is:
Will I ever be happy just being friends again?
Well, won't be the first time i fall for a friend. I think I should start dating again. All interested applicants should
Submit a formal request in writing. Comments are acceptable. ;-)

Day 2 of God willing Continued Internet

Ooh before i start---Mr. Marine if you're out there and reading:
Happy First Day of Class!!!!!
Hee Hee.
Damn I miss him.

Okay so no real updates I guess, except that I'm sooooo happy right now. Lets review, shall we?

Education: a number one priority: Expected graduation dat May 2006. No one put it on your calender, it's probably going to happen,---but like my undgraduate career, I don't really think of this as a "large" accomplishment. Maybe one day I will.

Lambda-ness: aw yes, aint that fresh, 385 emails to go.

Job--tiring, exhausting, gross on somedays, but wow, so cool.
Money--Decent. After realizing I had totally screwed up some figures, I'm breathing easier knowing I will have money for rent, utilities, food and gas expenses, and the ever important 178 dollar phone bill. Excessive, yes. But do I have any regrets? not a damn one. What can I say? 
"I've got ho's...."

LOL. JK.

As playa playa would put it: "What's really going on?"

Alright the update on " As the Ho' Turns"

*sigh? where to begin, the list?

In reverse as always
Haven't seen Blockbuster Boy, in case the El Paso Crew was curious. But I guess thats just laughable since that was like a what, hello?
um, HIM--well yeah, we're um...lol. I don't know what we're doing--what else is new, oddly we're on (what?) the 8th month of this?
Dentist--well no wedding bells, no alope-ment, but again as El Paso crew would acknowledge, and anyone who's seen Latino kings of Comedy could gather: when he was here
"I liket-ed-it"
--yeah and so did he ;-)
um, before that? 18 yr old boy is probably, hell i couldn't even guess? Don't know don't care
MR. Someone, yeah, maybe I'm transgressing, maybe I'm looking for closure, Maybe I just want to get him off my mind and think if I talk to him that will do it? I don't know, but as I couldn't help finally IM'ing this guy yesterday was the following
"Somehow the universe refuses to let me forget"
--so yeah, maybe one day that will be a don't know don't care, but for know, I guess I just don't know?
Before? Beside? Next too? who else? lol---as the Prophet says "Wait, is this guy number 3 or 4? I can't keep up?"
LOL, um, Playa playa nd me are talking again. and i do mean "talking" --literally, nothing more, swear. and in his famous affirmation "say swear to God" yeah, swear to God. Took him Christmas shopping, he took me for a ride in his new Nissan Z, thats been about it.
who else. Marine is in Wyoming. First class was today if ya'll missed it. and well, I miss him. *sigh* (Thank god for free nights and weekends)
who else? --Marine 2, or "the Daddy" is being a dad in NC.
the prophet is getting leave in april.
and J of course has his girl, and per comments, should be recieving calls shortly.
___
the girls, me and J-low have still yet to actually talk in like a month or two. life and distractions just get in the way i guess, but it's a two way street.
4 and 5 like J-low-ness have also vanished from my life
3 makes a total effort to stay in my life, and for that, kisses and vino sis.
my LS, housemate, co-worker, and right-side, Mrs. V is totally my de-stresser, and yet still not all oh we have to be best friends type. it's weird, but totally the bomb relationship. --Actually for as much as I see this girl it's amazing I don't hate her. I'm sure she's tired of me though, and my never ending stories of HIM.
D is the housemate I never see, and because of it--prob the housemate C will begin to see less of. Yeah, that was finals panic i think. There have been enough moments to re-assure me now that C would not go there.
So, yeah J, prayer works. lol
BTW, speaking of prayer--Blockbuster rental (lol) "SAVED" starring Mandy Moore--good. 3 stars
 Thats it. Seriously, there is my entire social circle minus 14 yr old, crush, and her girlfriend. Plus dad fam, which is SOOOO rare. I never see or hear from them,
but breath of fresh air, Sis from Dads side called yesterday, so refreshing, though SOooo high school, the drama of 14 yr old boys. geesh.
lol
so really if it aint in here, than i don't think it could be that important

We're gonna make this a write in, if I've forgotten anything, or you (lol)--lemme know. We will ammend and let the world know what else is improtant in the little universe I call my own.

oh, wait, almost forgot, the ex--he is seeing someone new. totally official. I saw his best friend the other night, very odd. anywhoo, but yeah. how do I feel? well I don't--it's an odd sensation. not threatened, almost relieved. like, "yay, she can deal with wrist splitting" --mean maybe, but after a semester of bad grades, I needed to vent. okay well, I say we drop him as a subject from now on, cause he's boring, yes? yes, I agree.
with that done and tidy, wow, am I growing up?
ewwwww....I should email my fellow 5 yr old in spirit now, and remind him of my talking Tao-teaching panda bear in Never Never land, so that I don't feel pulled together. wow, pulled together....lets see how long this last. lol
Love you all, besitos.

Based on recent events.....

In hopes not to jinx this yet again, I think I have internet.
ughhhhh. sad. but yet so happy. it's 12 I have to be up in 6 hours. must sleep.

Mr. Brightside

"I'm coming out of my cage
And I’ve been doing just fine
Gotta gotta gotta be down
Because I want it all
It started out with a kiss
How did it end up like this
It was only a kiss, it was only a kiss
Now I'm falling asleep
And she's calling a cab
While he's having a smoke
And she's taking a drag
Now they're going to bed
And my stomach is sick
And it's all in my head
But she’s touching his chest
Now, he takes off her dress
Now, let me go

I just can't look its killing me
And taking control
Jealousy, turning saints into the sea
Swimming through sick lullabies
Choking on your alibis
But it's just the price I pay
Destiny is calling me
Open up my eager eyes
'Cause I'm Mr Brightside

I'm coming out of my cage
And I've been doing just fine
Gotta gotta gotta be down
Because I want it all
It started out with a kiss
How did it end up like this
It was only a kiss, it was only a kiss
Now I'm falling asleep
And she's calling a cab
While he's having a smoke
And she's taking a drag
Now they're going to bed
And my stomach is sick
And it's all in my head
But she's touching his—chest
Now, he takes off her dress
Now, let me go

I just can't look its killing me
And taking control
Jealousy, turning saints into the sea
Swimming through sick lullabies
Choking on your alibi
But it's just the price I pay
Destiny is calling me
Open up my eager eyes
'Cause I'm Mr Brightside

I never...
I never...
I never..."

--------------------
Life without Love is like an unfinished symphony: beautiful but ultimately disappointing

Time home 9:01. Housemates home 0. One at work, the other- based on the roses, probably doing the same thing I was.
Like a big girl I've started saying when I'm leaving, and have begun to walk myself out to the parking lot-dilegently, and as
always, remaining stealth. avoiding all ex's, slipping by ll "Brothers," and magically avoiding all forms of the "Walk of
Shame." So why log this? To relay my summer talents me walking through hallways in heels remains ever graceful? No.
While talented and "Happy" there seems to be a shift...
I always want what I can't have. Alas! Perhaps the conquest has become to easy...No. In honesty, and for no better words than
those stuck in my head from last night- there seems to be a lack of "Clarity."
Yes. a month later almost i finally had enough time to review my comments, and in classic 14 yr old summary- "Yeah...Wow."
Shaken, no. shocked, yes. hopeful? not at all.
For some odd reason Mr. Someone remains in my eyes Above caring. not harsh, just as he puts it, "staying out of trouble."
anywhoo, tragic flaw of the night- one to be learned from by all men reading,
Never gentlemen, point out to the girl you are with, that the girl at the bar you previously called "Thick" is thinner than
than you. especially when you're going home with her,
Okay sleepy time now.

Omg. john mayer is haunting me now. really. i liked it so much more when he wasn't in the mainstream. howie day too

Scooby snacks. wow. i'm an idiot. and worse. is i'm an idiot for him. i need to stop this madness. been wondering not only if
I should, but if its possible. how do you break up with someone you love and still be friends. especially when you were never
actually together. -Wow. DejaVue(?) all over again. can we say same mistakes over and over again?
i have that song. even though i loved it. kinda like john mayer.
Love him just can't listen anymore though. not because JM isn't completely awesome, and not like i cry, but well- how do you
stay friends with Someone you loved?
j, and respectful permission from the ring wearer, you think i can get a call please? miss you.
Nice notes today: no kids threw up on me. my baby sister still thinks i'm kool enough to talk to her friends,& my 14 Yr old
Crush still calls me his girlfriend. lol. at least i have one "Man" that still loves me. lol. goodnight little universe

In abbreviation: reading "The Prince," still in love with "a friend," been thinking about my education and where its really
Going. got thrown up on by a kindergarten princess. am magically still looking cute and girl-like. as a matter of fact i keep
Catching glances of my self ever so often and i think i look like a porn star. not slutty porn star, but so cute i could be in
Some soft core no plot type cheesey thing. not that i ever watch. lol. right.
K. all done i think. except ever get in one of those moods to where the only thing other than sleep that sounds good is good
Wine and better sex. on that note. sleepy time

My hairs shorter. My Jeans fit looser. money seems to be under control. i've got boys from different area codes calling me.
All and all pretty awesome-O.
So why is it the one guy who can always make me smile just made me in to bed without one.
Side notes: J missed you. happy new year to you both. and thanks for everything.
P.s. block buster boy or BB Boy as dubbed by J, is gay i think. cant tell yet. but no more late fees!
You can guess what i'll be doing
Why is it when you want to talk noone is there, but them when you're busy getting your hair cut for instance People you'd
Really like to catch up with call or message you. and despite whatever longing there might be to catch up. the hair falling
Around you seems to beg different.
Relax all. It's two inches. HE won't even notice. promise.
Whatever though. i'm happy, and sleepy. maybe i'll in to the gym tomorrow and keep there pants falling off.
Alright. miss me... i miss you. besitos.