Forward from 3

No one falls in love by choice, it is by CHANCE.
No one stays in love by chance, it is by WORK.
And no one falls out of love by chance, it is by CHOICE

Okay. so still got the 6:45 a.m. gym thing going. be proud. only back fall- It's 9:35 and i'm about to crash. luv you j.
I appreciate all the support you've been giving me. marine luv~ thanks for the calls and messages. i miss you.
Classes are going well considering i'm taking 5 graduate courses. and a full load is 2.
And i go to the gym. and i work full time teaching, and i'm an area supervisor~~And yes i make time to play. hee hee
Other than that nothing new. --Actually. new perspective today. summary: i'm going to let this "Relationship" i'm in just be.
He said he didn't want commitment so i'm not going to force it. in the end i know where my pedastol is, and i'm quite content
until i'm taken off that top shelf, i guess i'll just get sweeter with time. It's day 2 of class and i've got spring break on

Life is good, Porn is better.
Is this true, and do I really have any intention on speaking of the matter? Well this remains to be seen. But I did think it
Sounded catchy when I got home. entirely too late might i add. but what can you do a kitchen had to be seen. - well not really
Technically I invited myself but, well like usual He didn't seen to mind.
Hey J, thanks for the update. always nice. the rest of the cyber world can learn from your example. :-)
Lambda-ness got messy tonight but nothing i am going to allow to ruin my "In control" calm. i like it, and i plan on keeping
it. euro trip was the evening movie. good times. *Yawn. i'm waiting for my laundry. its the longest 10 Minutes of my life.
No not really. ooh. wouldn't it be cool if we could choose the moments we'd want to stretch?
What would yours be? i wonder how many moment would include the opposite sex? i wonder how many would just involve sex?
its funny. the moment i'm thinking of already seems like it lasted forever. maybe i just want to change the moment. give the
Right answer second time around. wow. well no changing what might be the exact moment leading me to my current happiness. so
Se la vie. ooh. theses laundry
It really is the simple things in life that make you happy. or wait. maybe It's realizing the complicated things don't have to
take the joy out of everything. ~Regardless i'm happy. hope everyone else is too. good luck manana to all those in school. xxx

Joined the Club

Exhausted. But day off manana.
Been doing my "work" with Lambda-ness, and Damn, I'm good. but yeah... I like this whole, "I've got it together" thing. It's kinda nice.

In that respect, I think the dating thing just might be fun again. For all those inquiring, you may sign up on my calender, I have an available slot on Monday (as it is a holiday) and as of now, first come, first serve when it comes to the ever popular Thursday, Friday, Saturday free time that I possess. So, if you can "pencil me in" I can do the same for you.

You have my number. I invite you to use it, and yeah, I  won't cry if you don't.

Besitos

It's 9a.m. I've been awake for an hour. as i've laid in bed the following thoughts have raced through my brain. 1. what was
John Mayer playing last night in the tsunami relief concert? 2. I wonder how much money i have left in my account after last
night. 3. How much i really don't want to get out of bed to start this day. 4. How soon school will begin. 5. Why does the
universe haunt me with reminders of the past?
So...Here was yesterday. The begining of Lambda-ness begins with a 3 hour session and suprisingly-It's all good. that ends.
Followed by dinner with Sis and C. That ends. So begins the solo night with C. All is looking promising as i look cute and hot
and yeah. - Well I should have guessed it was going to be a night when the bar were supposed to be at is closed. okay. we wait
it out at the bar next door. bar were supposed to be at opens. no surprise, were 2 hours early before the band is schedulled
to play. we figure we'll wait it out. and play pool. So begins my twighlight zone reminders.
As we approach the bar, who else but JM would be on tv. no sweat. i move on. time passes new bartender enters the scene.
I look at him, he looks at me. its not him i think. and its not. but right in front of me serving my beer is Mr. Someones
Clone. thinking i'm on crack or that i've already had too much, i ignore it. throughout the night this bartender keeps coming
to check on us. i guess un-alone in my observation, C points out the obvious...
"That looks just like ..." ~ "Yes C, I know" ~ "Its not him, you know" " ~ "I know."
"Do you really think he's cute?" :-\ ~ "Yes C, I find him very attractive."
Subjects change. night goes on. drinking continues. I get a phone call, its J. i relay my night from the quiet of a bathroom.
We evaluate the universe and conclude with, "WEIRD."
The bands suck. We leave. Frontier is made into a quick stop- as there are "people he knows." God forbid we're spotted. Lol.
My place it is. We walk in and i'm called out. "Whats wrong?" I don't know what to say. For once in the back of my mind the
thought crosses my mind, "I think it might be okay to remember?" As always, I smile. I say, "Nothing."
He calls me when he gets home. I call him sweetheart. he laughs at my new label. I wake up and "Daughters" runs through my
head. so begins my morning...
Lol. For once, rather than be wrapped or fixated, I just find it funny. Gym time.

Online on a Friday night, by choice???

Yes homies, or lack there of.

I am home on a Friday night, and actually not bugged by this.

Why, we ask? Simple. One, I got considered for being taken out twice, but by the time I got back to them, both Chicitas had other plans, that didn't involve me, as I didn't answer my phone to accept invites, but se-la-vie.

Also, I have plans manana. Yay, plans. I love plans. Especially with C. --There really is no better "good times"--well, unless you count that time in Mexico, and well, then there was that time this summer....oh and then there was the night I ended up in some random closet with a Star Wars theme with that random Fraternity boy from Las Cruces that my girlfriend liked, and then we were pulled over by the cops, but let go because the cop thought i could drive, but I couldn't because it was his truck and I don't drive Standard, which was even crazier because somehow i did drive home that night with him and then the next morning, well, I can't remember his name, but I do have this cute A&F shirt, lol. ---Wow tangent much? What was I talking about????

Oh yes, good times...well okay, I've had my share, but emotionally---???

Ah, hell--who am I kidding? Okay so I'm the kinda girl that wouldn't mind occasionally swapping a few "good times" for a few well "memorable times." But well we're working on it, right?

uh oh. Sorror here...must be a good host. chat later

I think i have the internet from hell. *Sigh
Lambda-ness is weird lately. but nothing extreme. or rather--I have chosen not to make it extreme in my life.
J called. and for this we are appreciative. :-) unfortunately i'm still accustoming myself to my new lifestyle of chasing 5 yr
olds. somehow i'm still getting to the gym. i refuse to gain back the weight i had over the summer or just when i was dating
Grr... HE came over tonight. he "Just missed me" after "a whole week" of not seeing me. lol. i laugh, but anyone who knows me
knows i love it. and i know i've said it a hundred times but i think i might truly love him. Not love, like "Babe, I love you"
But like, "Yeah... i'd go with him to california if he asked-But he never will"
To think 8 months ago the questions are still all the same. then again, maybe not. now maybe the appropriate question is:
Will I ever be happy just being friends again?
Well, won't be the first time i fall for a friend. I think I should start dating again. All interested applicants should
Submit a formal request in writing. Comments are acceptable. ;-)